PART 2

 

Part  2

Bring the boys back. 

Let’s discuss the heritage that our boys are missing out on. We can start by discussing how important it is to see what they can be and who they want to be.  I can think of the idea that they can be a president, governor, congressman, lawyer, doctor, teacher, scientist, engineer etc. We have to pave the way for them by making sure they are knowledgeable of  their history through their history we then can find their heritage, each boy is a generation in himself. So why aren’t we spending more time on getting them prepare for their own generation? How do we do that?

I always say its starts at home, it’s under statement when we say a woman can’t raise a boy or teach him how to be a man.  I used to be the first to holler that I can, then after having a long conversation with my son, I realize that it’s not possible, we can raise men because we can’t walk in their shoes no matter how we admit that we can its totally impossible. Even though as black women we have a lot of obstacles in front of us, a  black man in today’s society burden is a little heavier than ours. So we need change OUR mindset as single women raising black boys.

We need to pay more attention to who we mate or sleep with, we need to know more about them, we need to know that they are familiar with their heritage or history, we can find that out by what they do and how they do it. Our boys HAVE to realize the position they play in the family. That can only be taught through another positive male. If you as the mother made the decision not to  mate with a positive person, then you blame yourself not the child.

Again, I will repeat this sounds easier said than done, we as women are very much to blame for our son’s cultural awareness especially when the father is absent. I am not saying we can teach them how to be a man, but we can teach them the cultural awareness of  who they are.

Our young black males deserve so much more when it comes to the knowledge all of their true history. If we traveled back to our African history, we will discover how important the role of the male is. The males were the head of the family, they hunted the food, they helped build the huts They were also the protectors of the tribes, When other tribes wanted to communicate with the tribes They used the males or chiefs to do the  talking.  Keep in mind, the males always had a mentor to show them how to do all the things described above.  

We need to understand that it’s   very important that we as a family continue to mentor our young boys by utilizing positive male figures. Not only do they need this, they deserve this. In order for our boys to stay out of prisons we have to show them how important they can be and how important that their presence is to the family. I believe that this is an ongoing mission for all of our people.

The most important part of a young boy’s life is who his father is. Why is this important? Even though we understand that a boy can take some of his mother’s personality too, but  the male’s role in their life has to be a role that   he will be able to  be cultivated in.  For instance, If you are raised in a family of violence  and you watch your father abuse your mother on a constant basis this will in some ways affect you it could be negative or positive but altogether it will have a certain effect on your life. 

 

 I will take something my son always told me, because his dad was not always in his life, he would 
tell me. ‘I will be a good daddy to my kids I will make sure that I play a  big part in their life.’ I would ask him what if you and the mother are not together, he would say ‘Mom, she will be my wife and I will make sure that we belong together.’  Now coming from a young boy that noticed that his father wasn’t  a constant present in his life took that and turned it into something positive by stressing he will make sure he will be a real father to his kids. This goes back to the saying that we as women don’t understand what it is to be a man, we can only teach them certain things.  I can quote stats all day but it still will not fix the problem of more and more of our young g
girls are having baby boys that are growing up lost with no direction. We have to understand that each child we bring into the world DID NOT ASK TO BE HERE AND DID NOT HAVE

A CHOICE OF WHO THEIR PARENTS WILL BE.